


Think of Me

by FandomDivergentChildofAkyls



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bathroom Sex, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes is also a dumbass, Bucky Barnes is good with Kids, Bucky Barnes's Metal Arm, Bucky and Reyna are stupid I'm so sorry, CEO Bucky Barnes, Co-Parenting, Dom Bucky Barnes, Dom/sub, Drunk Sex, Drunken Confessions, Exes to Lovers, F/M, Getting Back Together, Heavy Angst, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Insecure Bucky Barnes, Le Fantôme de l'Opéra | Phantom of the Opera References, Like he's drinking the dumb juice, Meddling Kids, Natalia Wanda Woods is a mood, Oblivious Bucky Barnes, POV Bucky Barnes, POV Female Character, Past Relationship(s), Protective Bucky Barnes, Reunion Sex, Reyna and Bucky's daughter is adorable, Reyna's a singer in this one, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Sam Wilson Is a Good Bro, Shower Sex, Single Parents, Slow Burn, Soft Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers Is a Good Bro, Top Bucky Barnes, feelings are hard, love never dies references, showmances, this is just pure chaos
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:15:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26896537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FandomDivergentChildofAkyls/pseuds/FandomDivergentChildofAkyls
Summary: Ten years ago, she was pushed out of his life like she meant nothing. Ten years ago, she also found out she was pregnant.Ten years later, he's on top of the world. He's got everything he could ever ask for. Her on the other hand, a single mom with a musical theatre job. She doesn't think their paths are ever going to cross again, until one day when he does a presentation in her daughter's class and figures it out like the asshole he is. Now he wants to get back into her life again. Sometimes, she really wished life could leave her alone.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 26
Kudos: 51





	1. Bucky Finds Out (And Gets Roasted In The Process)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very sorry for the angst and asshole Bucky I've created in this chapter, but it had to be done! Can I get a yes for Natalia Wanda Woods (Barnes) for her pure self?

“... Mommy?”

  
  
She snapped out of her thoughts. Reyna turned, looking over at her little girl. Natalia Wanda Woods held her little teddy bear, the ten-year-old wearing her unicorn PJs as she looked at her mother. 

“Yeah, baby?” Reyna replied, getting up from the table as she walked over to her. 

“Can you sleep with me?” Nat asked tensely. Reyna put her wine glass down on the table. She picked up her daughter. 

“Course, baby. Come on, time for bed.” Reyna replied, carrying her daughter to her room. 

She had barely had any money to rent a two-bedroom apartment after Bucky had dumped her. Once she found out she was pregnant, there was no use telling him. He had fallen away from her and probably wouldn’t listen to reason. All he cared about was the company then. She was a burden to him, and the man had even spat it in her face when he dumped her. Reyna sought solace with Natasha and Clint, who allowed her to stay with them with open arms. Then after she had given birth to Natalia, she had saved enough money to get the apartment she lived in now. 

Today was Monday. It was her day off from her job, playing Christine Daaé as an understudy. She adored her job. She didn’t care if she was tired every day and night— she loved playing the dark curly-haired girl. 

Placing her daughter into bed, she slid in next to her as the woman held her daughter close. 

“Mommy? Sing?” Natalia murmured softly. She held her teddy bear, which she affectionately named “Teddy” closer. 

“What song tonight, baby?” Reyna murmured as she gently ran her fingers through her daughter’s hair. 

“Look with your heart, mommy,” Natalia replied.

“Look with your heart, and not with your eyes, the heart understands- the heart never lies. Believe it feels, and trust what it shows, look with your heart, the heart always knows.” Reyna started to sing softly, as Natalia started to silently doze off. Reyna smiled as she saw her little girl dozing off. Her heart hurt. 

She looked so much like Bucky. She practically looked like a gender-bent carbon copy, except for her eyes. The eyes were all Reyna.

As Natalia slept, Reyna remembered. Remembered when she had found out she was pregnant and went to visit Bucky.

**_Ten Years Ago_ **

**Reyna looked up at Bucky’s little apartment door, taking a deep breath.**

**She could do this. She could do this. Reyna walked inside the apartment, seeing her boyfriend of five years, sitting down at the table. He was almost glaring. She knew he had been busier lately, but still encouraged him to work. His company was important to him, she wasn’t going to take that away from him.**

**“Bucky?” He didn’t look up.**

**“Bucky?” No answer.**

**“Buck?” Still no answer.**

**“James-”**

**  
** **  
** **“We’re breaking up.”**

**Reyna almost recoiled in shock. The happiness that she felt was suddenly crushed.**

**“What?” She replied, her voice almost breaking. Then, Bucky finally looked up, His eyes were cold. She almost flinched.**

**“I can’t do this anymore. I can’t have this- this _thing_ with you anymore.” **

**  
** **  
** **_Thing?_ Reyna felt like she had been slapped. Five years was really just a thing to him. **

**“Bucky, I don’t understand-” he cut her off.**

**“I found an investor last month. The company’s taking off. I can’t be distracted anymore.” He snapped. Reyna took a step back.**

**A month. He had hidden this for a month. She was his girlfriend, for fucks sake!**

**  
** **  
** **_Well, ex-girlfriend now._ She wanted to scream. **

**“Nice to know that’s what I was to you.” Her voice was sharp as she glared at him. He glared right back. Inside though, she was confused. She was hurt.**

**“I was going to tell you something, but since you sprung this on me, guess I don’t gotta spring it on you now.” Her Brooklyn accent shone through as she turned to walk to the door.**

**“What is it?” Bucky spat. Reyna stopped.**

**She had made her decision. If Bucky was going to be like this, he didn’t deserve to know. His heart wouldn’t change because of a child. Her child was not going to have a deadbeat for a father.**

**“Never mind I brought it up.” Then she walked out, slamming the door behind her. She had made it three blocks down from his apartment before she started crying. She managed to wring out her phone, calling Natasha.**

**“Hey. Did he take the news well?” She heard Natasha ask.**

**“Tasha,” Reyna sobbed.**

**“Hey, what’s wrong? Did he not take the news well?” Natasha replied, worry in her voice. Clint walked in, seeing his wife upset.**

**“Can… can you come pick me up? At the bakery. Please.” Reyna sniffed.**

**“Course, Rey. I’ll be there in ten minutes.” Then the line went dead. Reyna dragged herself to the bakery down the street, walking in and taking a seat at one of the tables.**

**Bucky had brought them there for their first date, all the way back in high school. They had been seniors then, the two of them having a crush on each other for years. Natasha and Wanda had finally set them straight, and Bucky had plucked up the courage to ask her out. He had brought her here, knowing how much she loved sweets.**

**Reyna began to sink into old memories. Before the breakup that had just happened. How she missed the signs? How could he fucking do this? She didn’t know what she did wrong.**

**Ten minutes later, Clint and Natasha walked through the door, seeing a Russian-Korean woman sitting at a table by herself, eyes locked at the table, a blank expression on her face. She looked like she had been crying, by the looks of her tear-streaked cheeks.**

**“Rey? Are you okay?” Clint signed as he sat down across from her.**

**“He broke up with me.” Reyna signed back.**

**“He what?” Natasha exclaimed. Reyna finally looked up at her best friend.**

**“He told me he couldn’t do it anymore. Said that the** **_thing_ ** **we had was distracting him.” Reyna replied blankly. Clint clicked his hearing aids on.**

**“Thing? What the fuck is his problem?” Clint asked, an edge to his voice. Both Clint and Natasha looked at each other. Reyna and Bucky were always together, no matter what they did. They were both introverts, so they spent more time alone together. They weren’t expecting this.**

**“His company got an investor a month ago. He wants to focus on it completely. Couldn’t have me in the picture anymore.” Reyna replied emotionlessly. Everything hurt. She wanted to cry. She wanted to scream.**

**“What… what did I do wrong? Why doesn’t he want me anymore?” Reyna whispered. Then she broke. She started to cry, tears rolling down her face. Crying wasn’t good for her throat, but she didn’t care. She needed to let it all out.**

**“You didn’t do anything wrong,** **_starlight._ ** **It’s Bucky who’s an asshole.” Natasha replied. She had used her little nickname for the other girl, in Russian.**

**“What am I gonna do, Tasha? I’m drowning in student debt, I don’t have a baby daddy anymore, I’m- my life’s fallen apart.” Reyna sobbed as Natasha sat down next to her and held her.**

**“You could live with us. Just until you give birth. We’ll be with every step of the way. Us, Wanda, Viz, Tony, Steve. The gang.” Clint replied. Reyna sniffed.**

**“Promise me… promise me that you’ll never tell… Bucky…” Reyna choked out.**

**“We swear.”**

**  
** **  
** Reyna didn’t realize she was crying until she felt the tears roll down her face. She quickly wiped them away, before turning and looking down at Natalia. Her baby girl looked so at peace, so blissfully unaware that her daddy was one of the richest men in the world now. That he practically lived in the same city as her.

  
  
Of course, Natalia had asked her who her daddy was. Reyna had told her that her daddy was a special man, but couldn’t be there when she was born. When Natalia asked if she was the problem, Reyna quickly hugged her and shut that theory down. 

_“No, my star. It was never you. Your daddy and I just had a different path, that’s all.”_ Reyna softly told her in Russian. Sniffing, Natalia nodded. 

_“Do you think he would’ve loved me, mommy?”_ Natalia asked. 

Reyna already knew the answer. 

No. 

_“I don’t know, baby.”_

  
  


Bucky let out a groan as he took a sip of his whiskey, feeling it burn in his throat.

Ten years had passed. He remembered hearing her words. 

“Never mind I brought it up.” It haunted him. It still haunted him. Sometimes, he’d have nightmares about it being the other way around. That she left him, dumped him.

But he couldn’t have any more distractions. 

Pulling out his phone, he opened Instagram again, and clicked the search bar, clicking her profile.

He had been keeping tabs on her for the past few months. Ever since Steve had come back from his tour, the dark-haired man caught him looking at her Instagram one day. 

It had been a picture of her standing in front of the camera, in costume. He knew which costume it was. It was her slave girl costume, with a caption that said: _Singing as her tonight._

She had been smiling at the camera, her eyes lit up in happiness. His heart immediately hurt. He remembered when they had been sitting at the door in front of the stage in high school, eating their lunch. She had been singing, and then she had told him, that she would be on Broadway one day, playing Christine. He promised her that he’d be there for her first performance. 

Bucky had heard her sing a lot in their relationship. He had adored her voice. It made him feel like he was on a cloud. That everything was fine with the world. Sometimes, she’d sing him to sleep. He loved it when she did that.

Now, nothing. It was dark and quiet, and Reyna didn’t sing to him anymore. Music no longer existed in his life. Bucky gulped down the rest of his whiskey, slamming his cup down. 

He had a long day tomorrow.

  
  


“Have everything, baby?” Reyna asked as Natalia beamed. 

“Uh huh!” Natalia replied. 

“Homework?”

“Yes, mama.” 

“Notebook paper?” 

“Yes, mama.” 

“Colored pencils and regular pencils?”

  
  
“In my small bag.” Reyna looked at her little girl, bending down to kiss her head. She loved her so much. 

“Good. Now, come on. We don’t want you to be late for school.” The two of them left the apartment, walking towards her school. They talked the entire way there, Reyna making Natalia giggle as the ten-year-old thought about what the presentation would be for today. Her teacher had said that Bucky Barnes, the CEO of **_Rebefing_ **was coming today for a presentation. She was so excited! When her teacher had announced that he was coming, she did her research on the company and him in excitement.

“Have a great day, sweetheart. I’ll come and pick you up, okay?” Reyna said, bending down to her daughter’s height. Natalia giggled and nodded. Reyna smiled and kissed her daughter’s forehead. 

“I love you, mama!” Natalia yelled as she waved at her mother as she walked to her classroom. Reyna waved back, smiling. Natalia watched as her mother walked away, headed to the theater, where she would be happy again, if only for a while. Natalia thought about Mr. Barnes, giggling to herself.

Natalia could only beam in excitement in her chair at her desk as she finished her little drawing of her mommy. She hoped she liked it. Maybe they would hang it on the fridge like they always did!

“... Alright class, he’ll be here in a moment. Please be on your best behavior.” She heard her teacher say. Suddenly, the door opened, and a tall, dark-haired, metal armed man stepped through the door. He wore a black suit, and his eyes traveled around the room. 

“Mr. Barnes, thank you so much for coming this morning.” Natalia heard her teacher say as she observed him. 

“Likewise,” the girl heard Bucky say. He had blue eyes that reminded Natalia of ice. She watched as he walked over her to her teacher’s desk, pulling out his own laptop and setting it up. Eager, Natalia took out some notebook paper and a pencil, already scribbling down some notes. 

“My name is James Buchanan Barnes, but my friends call me Bucky.” He started. 

“I started Rebefing after I lost my left arm. I wanted to help people like me. Does anyone know what Rebefing means?” Bucky asked. Natalia raised her hand.

“Yes, you. What’s your name?” Bucky asked. He looked at her. Then, he looked shocked, but he hid it. 

Reyna’s eyes were looking straight back at him. 

“Natalia. It means rebirth in Russian.” Natalia replied to him. Still reeling in shock, Bucky nodded, making Natalia beam. There was Reyna’s smile too. Good god, Reyna had a child? 

“Y-Yes. That’s right. Good job, Natalia.” Bucky stammered a little.

“Right, as I was saying…”

  
  


He had never been so happy for a presentation to end more in his life. The teacher thanked him afterwards, and the kids were let out to recess. They all left, except one.

Natalia. He watched the ten-year-old hum to herself as she sat in her chair, drawing a piece of paper.

“Think of me when we’ve said goodbye…” 

He stopped. He was in the middle of packing his things. He looked at the back of her head, watching her draw as she sang to herself.

“Natalia usually stays in during recess.” He looked at her teacher. Mrs. Baxter sighed as the blonde-haired woman looked at her student.

“She prefers to stay inside. Sings to herself. She’s a very bright young girl. Her mother is amazing.” She remarked. Bucky packed up the rest of his things before he looked at her.

“Her mother?” The words sounded foreign in his mouth.

“Oh yes! Her mother’s name is Reyna. She works on Broadway. Natalia always talks about her mother whenever she gets the chance. They’re very close. I tried asking her about the father, but Reyna only told me that they weren’t on speaking terms. Poor dear. She seemed very sad when she told me.” Mrs. Baxter shook her head. Bucky could only gape. 

“Mrs. Baxter? Look what I drew!” Natalia said, snapping Bucky out of his thoughts. He watched the girl run up to her teacher, proudly showing her art. 

It was a picture of Reyna and Natalia together, holding hands. Reyna was dressed looking like Christine, and Natalia was her usual self. 

“Oh, it looks lovely Natalia. Do you want to show Mr. Barnes?” Mrs. Baxter asked, leaning down to her. Natalia beamed and nodded, running over to Bucky. 

“How does it look, Mr. Barnes?” She asked, showing him the picture. Bucky’s mouth went dry as he looked. Then he remembered her singing. 

“So, you like Phantom of the Opera too?” Bucky asked, wanting to change the subject. Natalia’s eyes lit up and she nodded excitedly. 

“Nobody else really understands, except for my mommy. The other kids think I’m weird.” Natalia mumbled. Bucky looked at her. 

“No. That’s not weird at all. I like the musical too. Very much.” Bucky replied. Natalia looked at him, the look of pure innocence on her face. It reminded him so much of Reyna whenever she looked curious. 

“What’s your favorite song?” Natalia asked as she put her stuff away. Bucky sat down in the desk next to her, beckoning her to come and sit. Natalia sat down back in her chair. 

“Well, I don’t really have a favorite one. But, Think of Me is very good. Mrs. Baxter tells me your mom plays Christine on Broadway. Does… does she like it? Does it make her happy?” Bucky asked tensely. Natalia beamed. 

“She’s very happy. Almost as happy as being with me. She’s very tired though, but she loves doing it. It’s like she was made for the stage!” Natalia replied enthusiastically. Bucky couldn’t help but smile. 

_His sun and stars was really made for the stage._

_But she isn’t your sun and stars anymore, is she?_ A voice in his head snickered. He ignored it. 

“And… what about your dad?” Bucky asked. Natalia’s face darkened. He regretted the words as soon as they came out. 

“I don’t like my daddy very much. Mommy says they split up because they didn’t have the same path in life. Sometimes I think he doesn’t love me.” Natalia replied to Bucky. 

_They didn’t have the same path in life._

_They split up._

Reyna’s words came back. 

**“I was going to tell you something, but since you sprung this on me, guess I don’t gotta spring it on you now. Never mind I brought it up…”**

Suddenly, it clicked. Why Reyna had come in so suddenly. Why she had looked so excited, but once he broke up with her, she suddenly looked so cold. 

_She had been pregnant with Natalia. His sun and stars had been pregnant with their baby girl._

“I’m sure you don’t mean that, Natalia.” Bucky tried to say, but Natalia shook her head. 

“I don’t really care about him, really Mr. Barnes. If he’s that selfish, then he’s a big dummy. My mommy’s the best thing in the world. If he really split up with my mommy over a stupid thing, then I don’t care about him.” Natalia shook her head, beginning to scowl.

“Natalia, you shouldn’t say things like that!” Mrs. Baxter scolded her. Natalia looked at her teacher. 

“It’s been ten years, Mrs. Baxter. My daddy never visited me in my life. I always see other kids with their daddies. They love them. Why doesn’t my daddy come to see me? Doesn’t he love me?” Natalia questioned, her lip beginning to quiver as she tried not to cry. 

He felt terrible. 

“I’ve never been sent anything. And I know it makes my mommy uncomfy when people at the park ask me where my daddy is. My mommy looks so sad when people ask her where my daddy is, or when I ask. That's why I don’t ask anymore. Mr. Barnes- are you okay?” Natalia asked in concern, her big eyes wide. 

_He had started crying._ Everything Natalia said hurt him. Did his little girl hate him so much? God, he was a shitty father. Scratch that, he wasn’t even her father. He was some fucking sperm donor. 

“I’m- I’m fine, Natalia.” Bucky choked out. Natalia grabbed a box of tissues and handed one to him. He dabbed his eyes quickly. 

“No! I made you cry! I’m so sorry!” Natalia cried. Bucky chuckled weakly. 

_Just like her mother._

“No, no. You could never make me cry, Natalia. You just had me thinking of someone, that’s all.” Bucky replied as he wiped away his tears. Natalia frowned. 

“Who?” She asked. Bucky chuckled. 

“A girl I used to date back in the day. She was there… for everything. I had a crush on her ever since we were kids. We danced around each other for a while. She was there for me when I lost my arm.” Bucky gestured to his metal arm. 

“We started dating around our senior year of high school. But we broke up a couple of years later.” Bucky confessed. Natalia frowned.

“Why?” She asked. 

“Because I was selfish.” His reply was soft as he realized what he had done. 

_He practically abandoned his child. Left his sun and stars alone. He didn’t deserve her. His little girl sat right in front of him and she didn’t even know. She hated him and she didn’t even know it was him._

“I’m sorry Mr. Barnes,” Natalia replied, gently squeezing his flesh hand. 

“Don’t worry bout it, kiddo. And call me Bucky, I think we’ve reached that stage now.” 

  
  


Reyna had taken an Uber from the theatre to Natalia’s school so the woman could take her back to the theatre. When she got there, Natalia was beaming. 

“Did you have a good day?” Reyna asked as the two crossed the street. Natalia walked next to her mother as the two headed back to the theatre, Times Square bursting with life. 

“Yeah! I met Bucky Barnes today.” Reyna stopped moving, the color drained from her face. 

“We talked about Phantom of the Opera! He likes the musical too! You think he could come and see the show sometime, mommy?” Natalia asked curiously. Reyna, still reeling in shock, didn’t answer. 

“Mommy? Are you okay?” Natalia asked in concern. Reyna’s jaw tightened. 

“I’m fine, babygirl. Come on, we’re going to be late.”


	2. Natalia Meddles (And Gets Her Parents Reunited in the Process)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... this chapter took longer than expected. If I’m being honest, the flashback was the one that really cut me away from finishing this chapter. I just got stuck. But then I pulled through, and here we are: An extra long chapter. 
> 
> Natalia finds out who her daddy is, Steve drops by, and Natalia decides to pay a visit to her daddy.

“... Why the hell didn’t you tell me, punk?”  
  
  
Bucky had wallowed in self-pity for a week. Steve sighed, holding his head. Reyna was going to kill him. He wondered if she knew that Natalia had met Bucky. 

“Because she made us promise, Buck. After you dumped her, she moved in with Clint and Nat until she gave birth. She managed to save enough money to buy an apartment for her and Natalia.” Steve replied. 

Steve Rogers wasn’t going to lie, there was a part of him that desperately wanted to deck his best friend in the face. 

“Us? What do you mean, us?” Bucky demanded. Did everyone know? Had she made everyone else promise not to tell him?

  
  
“Everyone else had been told about what happened between the two of you. Sam and Wanda still want to beat your ass, by the way. When Reyna told them you said she was nothing but a distraction, they were ready to break into your apartment and teach you a lesson or two.” Steve shrugged. 

_The punk never cussed before. Why the hell was he cussing now?_

_  
_ _  
_ “Since when do you cuss, punk?” Bucky snapped. Steve gave him a look.

“It’s been ten years, Bucky. I’ve changed. You would’ve known that if you ever talked to me. But you haven’t. Nobody’s heard from you in ten years.” Steve replied quietly. 

The only person Bucky had seen those past ten years was Tony, only because Stark Industries and Rebefing used (mostly), similar material, and that their companies were so huge.

“You pushed away everyone, Buck. Did we mean nothing to you?” Steve pressed. Bucky scowled. 

“You know how important the company is to me, Steve.” Bucky snapped back. 

“And that’s the problem, Buck. It’s why Reyna never told you she was pregnant with Natalia. You dumped her like she was nothing, for the sake of Rebefing. She helped you, don’t you remember? She even came up with the company name because she knew how important your metal arm was to you. You became a totally new different person after you lost your arm, Buck. I know you did. But don’t forget, if it wasn’t for Reyna, you would’ve never gotten out of your shell.” Steve shook his head at his childhood friend’s arrogance. He couldn’t even recognize him anymore. 

This Bucky was a stranger. It wasn’t the same Bucky that would fight for him in alleyways in Brooklyn when they were kids. It wasn’t the same Bucky that had a weird sense of humor and liked to quote Star Wars movies. It wasn’t the same Bucky that held Reyna’s hand and protected her with his life.

  
  
It wasn’t the same Bucky that loved Reyna. Not anymore. 

“You abandoned her when she needed you most, Buck. I don’t blame her for wanting anything to do with you. She’s different now, Bucky. She isn’t going to fall into your arms anymore.”

  
  


Reyna had been in a state of numbness for that same week. She couldn’t process anything. She just seemed frozen.

Natalia had met Bucky. Did Bucky connect the dots? Her blood ran cold at that.

  
  
She hoped he didn’t. She hoped he was a fool.

“... Mommy? Are you okay?” Natalia asked. Her mommy had been sitting near the window, looking outside, lost in thought. Ever since she had mentioned meeting Mr. Bucky at school earlier that week, her mommy had gone quiet. Did she do something wrong?

  
  
“Mommy?” She asked again. Reyna snapped out of her thoughts. She looked at Natalia. 

“Yeah, Natalia?” Reyna asked. 

“Is Mr. Bucky my daddy?” Natalia asked. 

_And there it was. The fear. There was no use in lying to her baby girl._

“Yes, baby. Mr. Bucky is your daddy.” Reyna replied. Natalia’s lip quivered, and she began to cry. 

“I-I called him terrible, mommy! I said that I didn’t care for him!” Natalia wailed as Reyna picked her up, shushing her softly. 

“I was being so mean to him and I didn’t even know!” Natalia sobbed. 

“It’s alright, baby. You didn’t know.” Reyna soothed her. Natalia sniffed, tears beginning to stain on Reyna’s shirt, but the woman didn’t care. She carried her to her bedroom, gently tucking her in as she sat on the side of the bed. 

“Does he love me, mommy? He seemed so nice when I talked to him the other day. Oh no- I made him cry!” Natalia sobbed harder as Reyna held her. 

_Natalia had made Bucky cry? What on earth?_

_  
_ _  
_ “What do you mean, sweetheart?” Reyna asked her. Natalia sniffed. 

“I was talking about I didn’t care about my daddy… and he was right there,” Natalia sniffed. The girl laid her head on her mother’s shoulder, bawling her eyes out. Reyna could only hold her daughter as she watched her break down. 

Reyna knew she didn’t fit in with the other kids simply because she didn’t have a father. She watched her little girl look at all the other kids with a sad look in her eyes at the park while their fathers played with them. And to find out that her father was one of the richest men in the world that could give her anything if she asked?

  
  
It hurt her. She held Natalia, tears streaming down her face as she remembered the night Natalia was conceived. 

**Bucky had been working at his arm, his lips pursed as his eyebrows were furrowed in concentration. Reyna had been at her little corner, typing away at her laptop as she did her online schoolwork.**

**“Fuck!” He swore. Reyna looked up from her screen.**

**_“You okay, moon of my life?”_ ** **Reyna asked softly in Russian. Bucky swore again as he snarled in frustration.**

**_“I can’t seem to do this right,”_ ** **Bucky hissed. Reyna placed her laptop down and walked over, looking at the prototype. Her fingertips ghosted over the metal arm, before brushing over the fingers. Bucky swallowed, his dick twitching in his boxers. She turned to look at the little laptop he was using, punching something in the keys.**

**The arm didn’t move. Frowning, she looked at the screen, muttering to herself as she began to analyze it.**

**“I got it! Okay, look at this.” Reyna made room for Bucky to sit next to her. Bucky looked at Reyna, who gestures to the screen.**

**“It’s the thing right here— you just needed to switch it around— and there we go!” Reyna cheered, watching as the arm moved and flexed, Bucky nodding and watching in awe.**

**“You’re amazing,** **_my sun and stars._ ** **” Bucky breathed out. Reyna laughed.**

**“No. I could never do this. Not like you.” Her gaze turned to him, and her eyes softened. He leaned over, kissing his girlfriend hungrily. Reyna grunted and her hands flew to his hair, yanking him down on top of her as she fell back onto the floor.**

**“The arm,” Reyna managed to say through kisses, but Bucky interrupted her.**

**“Can wait. Need you first.” Bucky growled. His lips left harsh kisses down her throat, hands pawing at her shirt.**

**“Take it off,” Bucky ordered. Reyna panted, her body already feeling like it was on fire. Bucky seemed to do that to her, and she loved it every time.**

**“Do it yourself,” she clapped back. He let out a growl and pulled her shirt over her head, throwing it somewhere randomly in the room. Her panties soon followed, leaving her naked. Bucky slid her thighs apart, roughly placing his hands on her thighs, keeping them apart as his mouth dove down, beginning to eat her out like a man starved.**

**_“Oh… Bucky… yes…”_ ** **Reyna hissed in Russian, gripping her boyfriend’s locks as he slid two fingers into her, roughly pumping his fingers in and out, allowing more of her slick to travel down her thighs. He shoved another finger inside as he ate her out deeper, Reyna’s cries and Bucky’s groans as he drank up her slick echoing around the apartment. By the time he had a fourth finger in her, Reyna was a slurred mess. Bucky watched his usual blue-grey dark with lust.**

**God, he loved her like this.**

**“Bucky… I’m…” Reyna gasped, her walls beginning to clamp down on his fingers.**

**“Yeah, you about to come?” Bucky grunted, moving his fingers faster. Reyna cried out, frantically nodding her head.**

**_“Come for me, sweetheart,”_ ** **Bucky growled. Reyna mewled as she came on his fingers, and Bucky groaned at the feeling.**

**“Look at you, doing so well. You always look so good cumming on my fingers,” He grunted. He took his fingers out of her, coated with her slick. He sucked his fingers clean as Reyna fumbled with his jeans.**

**“Stupid fucking buttons,” the woman snarled irritatedly, managing to finally pop off the button, pulling his zipper down and Bucky getting out of his jeans and throwing them somewhere in the room, Reyna pulling down his boxers hungrily, her dark eyes blown with lust. His boxers soon joined his jeans, and Bucky grunted once Reyna took him in his mouth.**

**_“Fuck…”_ ** **he hissed, grabbing onto her hair, both metal and flesh hands tugging as her head bobbed up and down, trying to take enough of him down her throat as she possibly could, her hands reaching where her mouth couldn’t. Bucky grunted. He loved it when she was like this. He looked down, seeing her looking straight up into his eyes, mouth full of his cock as she sucked him off. It made him groan, thighs shaking as she took him deeper.**

**“** **_That’s it Rey… fuck right there,_ ** **” Bucky grunted, feeling his cock hit the back of her throat. He heard her choke softly, making him hiss. He gently massaged her throat, allowing his lover to relax a little. Then her lips wrapped around him and Bucky grunted as he came down her throat. Reyna released him with a pop and squealed as Bucky pushed her down to the floor, her hair fanning over the floor. He entered her with one thrust, inching inside her slowly, a wet sound echoing as he pushed in.**

**_“I love you. I love you so much.”_ ** **He breathed out, groaning at how good her walls stretched him. Reyna’s face was contoured in one of pleasure as she let out a shudder, a soft whine escaping her lips.**

**_“I love you too, oh-“_ ** **Reyna gasped as he pushed in, fully seating himself inside of her. It was enough for her eyes to roll to the back of her head in pleasure, her head falling back, her mouth opening slightly. Her body hit the floor with a soft thunk as Bucky pulled out before slamming back in. He quickly picked up a pace that left Reyna pleading, noises coming out of her mouth that she couldn’t make out. Bucky grunted and moaned, whispering in her ear about how good she felt. Her orgasm came, her walls clenching around Bucky’s dick as he fucked her through her orgasm, making her sob in pleasure as she held onto him. She knew he was close when his thrusts became less intense. His thrusts became sloppy and rough, and Bucky spilled his seed inside her with a groan. Still inside her, he lifted her up onto his lap, pressing a warm kiss onto her forehead, the smell of sex in the air. The two of them laid their foreheads together, soft smiles on their faces.**

**_“I love you, my sun and stars.”_ ** **Bucky murmured. Reyna smiled blissfully.**

**_“I love you too, moon of my life.”_ **

Reyna had tried to call Bucky after a few months of living with Clint and Natasha. The two had been out running errands, and Reyna’s mood swings wouldn’t stop. Her phone was pressed to her ear, Bucky’s number already dialed. She listened to the phone ring. And ring. And ring. Then she hung up and tried again. And again. But after a couple of tries of him not picking up, she gave up. With shaking hands, she blocked Bucky’s number. Him not picking up was just the confirmation that Bucky wouldn’t love her unborn child. She held her stomach that was beginning to show a small baby bump, whispering to her baby. 

“Looks like it’s just you and me, sweetheart. But don’t worry. I’ll take good care of you. You have all your aunts and uncles that’ll protect you. I’ll make the world safe for you. You’ll blow us all away.” She whispered, tears rolling down her face at the realization that Bucky was truly, _truly gone_ from her life. For a moment, her world burned. 

For a moment, fear gripped her. What would she do without Bucky by her side? How would she survive? Swallowing down her fears, she shook her head, beginning to wipe her tears furiously. 

No. She had her friends. She had her family. They’d support her every step of the way. So what if Bucky wasn’t there? If he wasn’t going to be a father, she didn't need him. She’d do it herself.

Reyna held Natalia close to her chest, her tears beginning to dry. 

“Does daddy hate me, mommy?” Natalia asked small. Reyna shook her head. 

“No, baby. I’m sure he doesn’t hate you. I think… I think he’s just confused.” Reyna managed to reply back. Natalia sniffed. “Why hasn’t he contacted us? Can we go see him? Can I see him again, mommy? I wanna see my daddy.” Natalia asked. Reyna faltered. Between her schedule, she didn’t know if Mondays were a good day to visit Natalia’s baby daddy. She often got home late, too. But the mornings were more flexible. Maybe during the weekends? Thoughts swarmed around in her head. 

_Did Bucky even want to see her?_ Nerves bundled up inside her. She didn’t even know what he looked like now. Sure, she had an Instagram. But that was the only social media she had. She was so busy with her job that dating wasn’t even in the question anymore. All that mattered was taking care of her daughter. And after Bucky, she didn’t know if she could love again. Nobody loved her as fiercely as Bucky did. The love Bucky had given her felt like she needed to live. The way he touched her made her feel like she needed to live. He knew her, inside and out. She hated herself sometimes. Like right now.  
  
  
But Reyna held her daughter close and fell asleep. Those thoughts would have to wait. 

  
  


“Anything else, Mr. Barnes?”  
  
  
Blue-greyish eyes looked at the woman in front of him. Dolores, or Dot as everyone called her around the office, Her dark hair was held up in her signature ponytail, her brown eyes sharp. She looked pristine as always, blouse tucked into her skirt with her heels all shiny. Bucky hired her a few years back. She always kept his schedule together and was very precise about her time. 

“No. You’re free to go home. Say hello to Nathaniel for me.” Bucky replied. Nathaniel was Dot’s five-year-old son. Dot smiled at him before leaving the room, shutting the door behind her. Once he couldn’t hear her heels clicking on the floor anymore, he pulled out his whiskey from his desk, taking a swing. The whiskey burned down his throat. It was a welcoming feeling. It helped numb the feelings that had been feeling the past week. Thoughts swam in his head as he looked at the bottle. 

_She was going to tell him. She was about to tell him before he brushed her off. Why had he left her run off like that?_ Bucky nearly smacked himself with the bottle. But instead, he took another swing from it, feeling the familiar burning sensation. He had tried. He had tried to get over Reyna, but he couldn’t. There was always that itch that those other women couldn’t scratch. Whether it’d be a touch, or the familiar feeling of different, yet familiar hands dragging across his chest, it wasn’t the same. All he could hear was her. _Every single fucking time._ He heard her moans, her gasps- just her. He imagined her too. He remembered how to go down on her, what she liked. He knew what made her scream. He even thought of her when he slept with those other women. 

He was weak. He tried to brush her off, tried to move on, but couldn’t. Now that Natalia’s teacher told him she worked on Broadway, and now that Natalia told him she was an understudy for Christine, he quickly tried to find bootlegs on YouTube. Audios, bootlegs, interviews- anything. He opened his phone to finish watching the video he found of her. It was a character study of Christine Daae. 

_“ I’m Reyna Woods, and I’m an understudy for Christine Daae from Phantom of the Opera at the Majestic Theater on Broadway.”  _

_“Christine Daae, for me, is a very flawed character. She’s lost her mother in childbirth, and her father at that young age where no kid should really lose their only parent. And they were very close too, you know? So that makes it hurt more. And, she is really hurt by it still, to this day. And the two biggest relationships for her in the show, Raoul and Erik, as known as the Phantom, are examples of that. Raoul represents that light, the one that reminds her of the times where her father was still alive. Raoul represents happiness. He’s like your teenage boyfriend from high school. That really sick puppy love, high school sweethearts who think they’re going to be together forever.”_

_They had told each other they’d be married someday. He promised her he’d marry her. Promised her if the company ever took off, that he’d marry her._

_And then what happened? His company took off and he left her alone._ Bucky held the bottle tighter but continued to watch the video.

_“And Erik represents the darker side of herself. The side that makes her realize that she should stop being naive. The side of her that makes her a woman, that makes her jump into those dark desires. You see it in the title song, Music of the Night, and Point of No Return. Erik is basically that older guy that you can’t help but be attracted to. The person that brings out the deeper desires of yourself, the one that makes you feel like truly yourself. And I think Christine’s scared of that. She’s scared of coming out of her shell, because really at the end of the day- nobody understands her more than Erik, who really isn’t nice to her in the musical at all. He’s in love with her, but it isn’t healthy. He’s possessive, demanding, and kills an innocent man for it. Love makes you do crazy things, but it doesn’t mean it’s right in some cases.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _ “You know, I don’t think that Erik or Raoul really deserve Christine. Unpopular opinion, I know.” _ He heard Reyna laugh before she started speaking again. As he watched, he saw Reyna dressed in her wig and did her makeup, putting some blush on her cheeks, before grabbing her false eyelashes and putting lash glue on them.

_ “I think they’re both bad for her. Christine clings to Raoul because he represents her childhood. The goodness. But I think he’ll never understand her as Erik did. Once she marries Raoul, she can’t sing anymore. Raoul’s a Victome, and she’s just an opera singer. His family will never accept her. And I don’t think she’d be ready to give up the most important thing in her life. I know I wouldn’t.” _The camera moved over to a picture of Reyna and Natalia, to what looked like a picture taken in Central Park. Both Reyna and Natalia were both dressed casually, and smiling up at the camera. Watching it made Bucky’s heart ache. He should’ve been there. He should’ve been there in that picture.

_“As a single mom, my daughter’s the most important person in my life. She’s been my rock since she’s been born, and I wouldn’t trade her for the world. She really is my number one supporter, you know? Other than my family and friends, it’s just her. She’s all I got, and I want the best for her. So baby you’re watching this, Eomma loves you very much.”_

The camera switched back to Reyna again, as she put her lashes on, putting mascara to blend the two together, before putting it away. He watched as she contoured her cheeks, and then started working on her eye makeup. 

_“And as for Erik, I feel like his love towards her is genuine. But it’s not normal. Since Erik’s never been shown compassion in his life, he doesn’t know how to show love. And it makes him a relatable character, but it doesn’t make his actions right. He should’ve never treated Christine like that, no matter how much in love he was with her. You just don’t do that to people. Maybe in another world where Erik and Christine communicated, they would’ve ended up together. Because really, it wasn’t his face that Christine was scared of- it was his temper.”_

Reyna finished her eye makeup as she grabbed her pink liquid lipstick, beginning to put it to her lips. 

_ “I do this thing where I like to put on pink, and then red lipstick in Act II. It represents Christine’s journey into a woman. And when we reach Point of No Return, she’s completely in dark red. She’s completely a woman now. She knows how it feels like to feel those deeper desires. And she’s matured. She’s different. To me, Erik really isn’t the main character of Phantom- Christine Daae is. I mean, if the opera ghost and the most important patron fighting over her doesn’t scream the main character- I don’t know what does.” _

_ “I don’t think I’ll ever be bored of playing Christine Daae. She’s been my dream role since high school. I even saw it as my first Broadway show, and I told my then-boyfriend at the time: “That’s gonna be my Broadway debut.” And he’s like: “I’ll come and watch your first show.” We’re not together anymore, so he didn’t really come to see my first show. Sometimes I wonder what he’s doing now. Passes my mind. But I don’t really focus on that. I’m pretty happy with my life right now. I have the most important person in my life, I’m playing my dream role on Broadway- there’s not much that would bring me more happiness.” _

The camera switched to Reyna fully dressed in her slave girl costume, a smile on her face as she turned to the camera, making Bucky feel like he was there. He should’ve been there. He remembered her saying that Phantom was going to be her Broadway debut. And it was. But he didn’t show up. He didn’t even know that she had scored her role because he was too busy with the company. Bucky took another swing. He watched as she did a mock salute to the camera and laughed, before she smiled and walked down the stairs. He heard the title song instrumental play before the video ended. 

He was crying. Tears were rolling down his face again, just like they did in Natalia’s classroom. But all he could do was drink. He’d drink his sorrows away for now. His driver would just have to wait to bring him home for that night. He needed to drown his sorrows, and maybe lock himself in the bathroom in his office to get rid of his erection that had formed. When Bucky had taken a shower in his penthouse later that night, hand gripping his hardened erection as he thought about Reyna, about how nice she would’ve looked, held up against the shower tile as he fucked her. He imagined her moans and gasps, and it was enough for him to come, grunts escaping his lips as he gasped. Shudders erupted from his mouth as he watched his come all over the floor in disarray. Bucky panted. 

_Ten years had passed, and nothing, absolutely nothing had changed._

  
  


Natalia Wanda Woods had a plan to see her daddy again. She pocketed her phone that her Eomma had given her, looking at her daddy’s profile again. She had gotten everything from him, except her eyes. Natalia’s eyes were all her mother’s. Her smile too.

_Eomma, I’m sorry._ She thought as school ended, the little girl rushing outside. She was going to make her way to Rebefing, and see her daddy again. Whatever it took. She followed the GPS, her earphones plugged into her phone and in her ears. The good thing about New York was, nobody really cared. So no one paid attention to the little girl that was walking down the streets of New York to see the CEO of Rebefing, James Buchanan Barnes. 

Once she reached her destination, she looked up. It was a large dark grey building, with a bunch of windows. It looked like a skyscraper to her. She entered the two big glass doors, tugging on them with a soft grunt. She entered the lobby, almost stumbling, but made it inside with a grin on her face. Dot, who had been walking by, noticed Natalia and stopped. She was looking at James’s lookalike. But the eyes. The smile. Could it be? 

“I’m here to see James Buchanan Barnes. My name is Natalia Wanda Woods.” The ten-year-old said proudly, puffing up her chest. 

_Oh yeah. This was definitely Barnes’ kid._ Smiling, Dot held her hand out to the little girl. 

“ My name is Dolores. But everyone round’ here calls me Dot. It’s nice to meet you, Natalia. I’ll take you to him, sweetheart. This way.” 

  
  


Natalia watched in awe as Dot led her to her daddy’s office. Everything was so polished. White walls with abstract paintings hung around the long hallway leading to Bucky’s office. She saw people working at their office cubicles, and some even stopped their work to see the little girl that looked like a mini version of their boss, but with different eyes and smile. Finally, Dot stopped at two big doors with silver handles. She knocked twice. 

“Yes?” Natalia heard a deep male voice say from the other side. Her heart leaped. Her daddy! Her Appa was on the other side of the door. She’d see him any minute now. Excitement thrummed in her. 

“Sir? I have someone here with me. A Natalia Wanda Woods is here to see you, Mr. Barnes.” Dot replied smoothly. There was silence before her Appa answered. 

“Send her in.” Dot opened the door and ushered the little girl inside, before shooting her a wink and closing the door. Natalia was alone, and she watched as her Appa stood up from his chair. She broke out into a room, her backpack falling to the floor as she embraced her Appa. 

_“Daddy!”_ Natalia cried. Bucky buried her face into his shoulder, his eyes full of tears as he embraced her tightly. He closed his eyes, breathing her in. 

_“I’ve missed you, daddy,”_ Natalia murmured as Bucky picked her up, a soft squeal escaping her lips in surprise. Bucky chuckled weakly, Natalia getting her out of his shoulder, watching as the tears rolled down his face. 

_“Daddy, you’re crying again!”_ Natalia exclaimed. Bucky chuckled again, shaking his head. 

_“No, baby. These are happy tears. I’ve just… I’ve just missed you so much.”_ Bucky choked out. Natalia sniffed. 

_“I’ve missed you too, daddy.”_ Natalia replied. Bucky walked them back to his chair, turning it so they could see the New York skyline in front of them. Natalia could only watch in awe.

“It’s so pretty,” Natalia spoke in awe. Bucky chuckled. As he looked down at his little girl who was watching New York burst with life, he couldn’t help but imagine Reyna right there beside him. That was how it was supposed to be. Natalia, Rey, and him looking out of his office, all three of them- together. One big happy family. He couldn’t help but gaze down at his left hand. There should’ve been a wedding band there. There _could’ve_ been a wedding band by now.

_Wait. Did Reyna even know she was here right now?_ Looking at his daughter, Bucky asked, “Does your Eomma know you’re here right now?” Natalia flushed and shook her head. She looked like Reyna whenever he had caught her doing something she shouldn’t have. A memory of him catching Reyna making cookies at three AM came to mind. He swallowed the feelings down. 

“Do you have a phone? So we can call her and tell her you’re okay?” Bucky asked softly. Natalia nodded and held out her phone. 

“Well, unlock it, sweetie. Then we can call your Eomma.” Natalia unlocked her phone and called Reyna on speakerphone. There was a ring. And then another one. Finally, Reyna picked up. 

_“Natalia Wanda Woods! Where have you been? Mrs. Baxter told me you were at the apartment! I thought you were at school! Where are you, young lady?”_ Reyna cried into the phone. Bucky nearly choked. Oh god, he hadn’t heard her voice in so long. He missed her voice. So long… it had been so long… 

_“Eomma! I’m with Appa!”_ Natalia cried. There was a sudden silence. Then, Reyna spoke.

“Put him on the line, **_kkoch._ **” Reyna demanded. 

“You’re on speaker, _my sun and stars._ ”  
  
  
_“Do not call me that.”_ Bucky flinched at her tone. Natalia noticed and leaned into him as he nuzzled into her hair. 

“What the heck are you doing with my child, Barnes?” Reyna demanded. Bucky couldn’t help but feel a little hurt at that. Sure, he hadn’t been the world’s best father, but he didn’t know of his daughter’s existence until a week ago! Couldn’t she cut him some slack? 

“Dot brought her up here. I’m guessin’ she came to see me.” Bucky replied calmly, his Brooklyn accent coming through. Reyna chewed her lip as she felt the familiar wetness pool at her legs at the tone of Bucky’s voice and his fucking accent. She shook her head, trying to erase the thoughts from her mind. She would _not_ get wet by her damn ex’s voice. She wouldn’t be weak. But that little voice in her head kept taunting her. She hadn’t gotten laid in ten years due to her job and taking care of Natalia. Besides, she knew damn well if he wanted to, he could have her be putty at his feet again. He knew her body like no one else.

Hold on, why the fuck was he so calm? She had expected him to be angry, at least. 

“... Is she okay?” Her voice was soft. Bucky’s heart hurt. Did she think he’d hurt his own daughter? He couldn’t help but feel a little angry. Yeah, sure, he was a dick, but Natalia was his daughter too. He would never hurt her. 

“She’s fine. She’s looking out the window right now. You wanna see?” Bucky asked. Reyna swallowed. He heard it too. 

“Yeah, sure. Hold on.” The call ended, and not a second later, a FaceTime alert appeared on Natalia’s phone, and Bucky accepted the call. 

His breath caught in his throat. Grey-blue eyes met dark brown ones as Bucky and Reyna stared at each other, for the first time in ten years. She was just as beautiful as he remembered. Age didn’t seem to affect her at all. Or maybe that was just the phone screen. She was wearing a faded shirt. He recognized it as his old burgundy long-sleeve shirt. She had kept his shirt?

Maybe she wasn’t as over him as he was with her. The thought gave her hope. 

“... Hi,” Bucky spoke quietly. Reyna could only stare. From what she could see, Bucky was wearing a black suit. She swallowed again, the wetness that was pooling at her thighs becoming more apparent. Yup, she was really getting wet from her ex again. Her love life officially fucking sucked ass. 

“H-Hi.” Reyna stammered back. She mentally slapped herself. But just then, Bucky flipped the camera, allowing the Korean-Russian woman to suddenly look at the New York skyline. He then turned the phone to Natalia, who waved at her Eomma. 

“Eomma! Look! The skyline’s so pretty!” Natalia cried. Reyna couldn’t help but softly chuckle. She couldn’t remember the last time she actually sat down to look at the skyline from her apartment patio that they had. It was small, but it could fit the two of them there to see the sky at night. 

“Yes it is, baby. It’s very nice.” Natalia couldn’t help but frown. 

“You should come over, mommy! I wanna see you look at it in person!” Natalia chirped. Reyna stopped. So did Bucky.

They hadn’t seen each other in ten years. What could happen in those ten years? Reyna’s thoughts echoed in her head before she made up her mind. 

“Alright, baby. Just… give me a couple, okay? I’ll Uber straight over there. Let me get the location and I’ll be there. Be good for your Appa, okay?” Reyna asked softly. Bucky’s heart leaped at that. Maybe there was hope after all. 

“Whatcha mean, Eomma? I’m always good.” Natalia answered innocently. Reyna groaned before she hung up, but not before she switched the camera back, Bucky and Reyna sharing one last look before the call ended. 

  
  


Reyna’s first thoughts were: Holy shit. And then she started to internally panic. She was undressed. She knew she should’ve changed, but she was too lazy to. She was still in the burgundy shirt with black jeans and her flats. Her stage makeup had still been on too. She walked inside the huge building, feeling intimidated. Everyone looked well dressed, and there she was, looking as plain as ever. She would’ve never fit in here. 

“... Are you Reyna Woods? Mr. Barnes says he’s been expecting you with Natalia.” Reyna turned, looking at a serious-looking woman with dark hair pulled up into a ponytail, her dark brown eyes sharp, but there was a small smile on her face.

“Yes. That’s me. She didn’t give you any trouble, did she?” Reyna asked kindly as the two began the walk to the elevators. 

“She introduced herself as Natalia Wanda Woods, and said she was here to see James Buchanan Barnes.” Dot chuckled as the two entered the elevator, the woman punching the button for the tenth floor. Once the doors opened, the two women walked to Bucky’s office, the Korean-Russian woman looking around the place, still feeling out of place, unlike her daughter. Dot stopped. 

“So, it’s true.” Reyna stopped, looking at her. Dot was looking at her with a look of understanding. 

“What is?” Reyna replied, confused. Dot gave her a sympathetic smile. “That James is Natalia’s father. I see it now. She looks like him but has your eyes and smile. He’s the father, isn’t he?” Reyna looked down, but then looked back up. 

“Yeah,” Reyna replied softly. Dot smiled softly. 

“You know, he hasn’t had a stable relationship for ten years. He’s had hookups. None of them seemed to stick. Now I know why.” Dot hummed. Reyna could only stare. Of course he’d have one-night stands. Why wouldn’t he? Bucky was rich now, for fucks sake. 

“I heard him moan your name once, you know.” Reyna choked on thin air. She was pretty sure her face was red from embarrassment or shock. 

“I was walking by his office. His doors were closed, but I heard him say ‘Reyna’ and then I heard him getting slapped across the face. Then he basically kicked the poor girl out. Poor gal was fuming with anger. Marched right out of the office. After that James locked himself in his bathroom and wouldn’t come out for three hours. He was probably jerking off to you.” Dot shrugged as the two walked to Bucky’s doors. 

“Three hours? What the fuck?” Reyna exclaimed. She knew Bucky had huge stamina, she did too, but he jerked off to her for three hours? What the fuck? The wetness had appeared in between her legs again, and for once, she was happy that her panties and jeans were black. She took a deep breath in and out as Dot knocked on the door. 

“Oh. By the way, the name’s Dolores. But people round’ here and the boss calls me Dot. It was nice to meet you, Reyna.”

  
  


Dot had left her alone after knocking on the door. 

“Eomma?” There was her babygirl. 

“Yeah, it’s me, **_kkoch._ **” 

_“Come in, doll.”_ Her heart broke at the use of the nickname. This time, she didn’t bite back, and opened the massive doors, walking inside and shutting the door behind her. When she turned, she was graced with the view that almost made her faint. Blue-grey eyes seemed to bore right into her soul like old times. His hair was trimmed and short now. But, he sported a beard too. She found herself not hating it. His suit was all black like the FaceTime call, and when he walked over to her, her breath nearly caught in her throat. He looked down at her, his gaze unmoving. His jaw clenched.

  
  


Bucky was sure he wasn’t alive. He was living an out-of-body experience. Reyna had been dressed in his burgundy long-sleeve shirt, black jeans, and her flats he remembered she loved. Her stage makeup was still on her face, but Bucky didn’t mind. She could’ve had no makeup and he’d still worship her. He wanted to worship her now. The fleeting thought of pinning her against his desk was very tempting, but Natalia was in the room. 

Natalia was watching the exchange with a secret smile on her face. The room was quiet, except for Bucky and Reyna’s eyes looking into each other. They were like old lovers, seeing each other after a long time apart. They were, but that was besides the point. The little girl grinned from her spot at the window as Bucky and Reyna continued to stare into each other’s eyes, practically having a silent conversation with each other. 

_I’ve missed him so much._

_I’ve missed her so much._

_I want to apologize to her. I want to get on my knees and beg for forgiveness. I want them back in my world again._

_I don’t know if I want him to apologize to me. I want him back in my world again._

_God, I’d do anything for this woman._

_God, I’d do anything for this man._

“Eomma, Appa! The skyline!” Natalia jumped up and down, motioning for her parents to come join her. Bucky and Reyna snapped out of it, their eyes wide with shock as they scrabbled to get themselves not looking so stupid looking. Bucky held out a hand. Reyna faltered, before silently placing her small hand in his big one, sucking in a breath as his hand closed, leading her to the huge window, allowing her to see the New York skyline. Natalia held her Appa’s hand as the three of them watched the New York skyline in peace, looking like a family. Just the three of them. It would be quiet for now. For now, all Bucky and Reyna could focus on was the skyline. She’d yell at him later. He’d grovel later. Nothing mattered now than their daughter, and the peace and quiet. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. Everyone Is Pissed Off At Bucky For Being a Dumbass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> | Grab your popcorn and your tissues. Warning, a lot of angst, and desperate! Bucky. Also some suffering! Bucky. The gang's all here, and they're all taking a piss at Bucky. Bucky meets up with Reyna and Natalia at the park and acts like a father for the first time. More flashbacks and we see Reyna when she gives birth to Natalia. So yeah, get your snacks and tissues... you're gonna need em. Bold and underlined is Korean and italics is our good ol Russian as usual.

_“Hey. Wake up, doll.”_

_  
_ _  
_ _“Mmm..”_

Bucky looked at the sleeping woman who had fallen asleep on his leather couch. Natalia was huddled up against her Eomma, her hair falling into Bucky’s burgundy shirt. Reyna slowly woke up, seeing Bucky’s concerned face above her. Had something gone wrong? Why was he looking at her like that? 

_“Natalia. Wake up, sweetheart.”_ Reyna whispered. Natalia stirred, beginning to open her eyes. She let out a yawn. 

“Eomma… is Appa still here?” Natalia asked, her voice slurred from sleep. Bucky gave her a soft smile. “I’m still here, Natalia. It’s time to go home, sweetheart. You got school tomorrow, don’t you?” Natalia nodded sleepily. Reyna watched as Bucky pulled out his phone, thumbs unlocking his phone, dialing a number, and putting his phone to his ear. 

“... Yeah, could you come to pick us up?” She heard Bucky ask as she got up, holding Natalia close to her chest as the ten-year-old pressed her head into her Eomma’s shoulder, falling asleep again. Bucky picked up her backpack, holding it by the handle. Reyna saw Bucky roll his eyes, but an amused smile was on his lips as he answered, “... Yeah. Change of plans. No- we’re not going to the penthouse. We’re just dropping them off at home.”

She paused. She looked at Bucky, watching as he spoke into the phone, his words becoming quieter as she began to tune him out, mulling over what he just said. _They weren’t going to the penthouse? He was just going to send them home back to the apartment? Would he go with them too?_ Thoughts continued to swarm her head. 

_“You okay?”_ Reyna snapped out of her thoughts as she found herself looking into his blue-grey eyes. She stammered for a second, looking like she had just been caught stealing out of Bucky’s cookie jar. And she had, on a couple of occasions. Bucky watched the dark-haired woman lick her lips in nervousness before answering. _“Yeah. So… you’re taking us home?”_ She asked softly. Bucky gave her a confused look as the three walked to the door, Bucky locking the door behind them.

“Why wouldn’t I?” Bucky replied. Reyna faltered. 

“I… I just thought…” Reyna stammered. Bucky cocked his head, reminding her of the Bucky that would give her that look before he’d pin her down and fuck her brains out. She remembered how much she loved him like that, dominating her in every way possible. Her nerves flared up more as he stepped closer to her, an eyebrow raised. Then, it clicked. He shook his head.

“I’m not going to do that. I just called my driver to take you two home.” Bucky replied smoothly. Reyna paused. 

“You thought I’d do that to you?” Bucky spoke, a little quieter since Natalia was still sleeping. He beginning to feel a little hurt. He was a little angry, but he was more hurt.

“I don’t know,” Reyna replied quietly. Bucky just sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. 

“Come on, my driver’s waiting. I’ll make sure you both get home safe.” 

  
  


The ride back to the apartment was quiet. Natalia ended up snoring against her mother as Reyna looked out at the window, trying to ignore the huge wall of awkwardness between her and Natalia’s baby daddy. Bucky was looking at her while his driver watched through the mirror. 

M’Baku did not get paid enough for this. He fully blamed T’Challa. And Shuri. And now, James Buchanan motherfucking Barnes. Being Bucky’s personal driver, he had seen some shit. Had seen Bucky pick up a random woman to bring home. Hell, he had even seen him drunk and crying over this ‘Reyna’ woman a couple of times. 

_But this?_ This was just weird, even for him. 

“You don’t pay me enough for this, boss,” M’Baku grunted. Bucky met his eyes in the mirror. 

“Don’t be greedy, M’Baku.” Bucky only grunted in response. M’Baku rolled his eyes. He looked at the Korean-Russian woman in the back. 

“Say, are you that Reyna woman the boss’s been crying over?” M’Baku asked bluntly. Reyna’s cheeks colored. Bucky glared at the smirking man. 

“M’Baku,” Bucky growled. M’Baku smirked. 

“Just being curious, boss,” M’Baku replied cheerfully. 

“Um… yeah. That’s me.” Reyna awkwardly replied. “Oh. Now I see why the boss took an interest in you. She’s cute. How’d you let her get away?” M’Baku sent her a teasing wink. Reyna turned even redder and resisted the urge to sink into her seat while Bucky scowled at him. 

“I will cut your pay if you don’t shut your damn mouth, M’Baku,” Bucky grumbled. M’Baku snickered. 

“Whatever you say, boss.” 

  
  


The sound of the car door closing behind them was the sound that Natalia woke up to. Still tired, she spoke in a gurgly tone. “Eomma?” Natalia asked sleepily. She felt Reyna pressing a soft kiss on her head. 

“I’m here, kkoch,” Reyna murmured as she walked inside the apartment complex, heading to the elevator. Bucky followed behind, entering the elevator with the two. 

“Appa?” Natalia asked. Bucky turned at the sound of his daughter’s voice. 

“M’ here, _baby_ ,” Bucky replied lowly. Natalia smiled sleepily through her mother’s shoulder. Reyna pressed the button for the third floor, the doors closing. Natalia yawned, mumbling something under her breath. The elevator dinged as the three of them got out, Reyna leading the way to the apartment door. 

_**107.** _

Reyna smiled as she unlocked the door, Bucky’s footsteps following her. The hairs on the back of her head rose up. _What was he doing?_ Reyna walked into Natalia’s room, tucking her in. 

“ **Eomma? Can Appa come in too?** ” Natalia asked sleepily. Reyna looked outside her daughter’s door, seeing Bucky still standing in the middle of the apartment as if he was a stranger. She nodded. Reyna got up from Natalia’s bed, walking over to Bucky. 

“ _She wants both of us to tuck her in tonight,_ ” Reyna whispered. That seemed to snap Bucky out of it as he nodded, the two of them walking into Natalia’s room, sitting on either side of her bed. Bucky gazed around his daughter’s room, seeing white walls that were loosely decorated with some movie posters. Some of them were Disney, some of them were Barbie. He even saw a Monster High one too. A desk was slated against the wall near the window. Bucky could hear the sounds of New York below him. His gaze fell upon his daughter, who was watching him with a sleepy smile.

“ _Hi, daddy,_ ” Natalia mumbled sleepily. Bucky chuckled, running his fingers through her hair. Natalia yawned, relaxing into his touch. 

“ _Hey, baby. You get some sleep, alright? You got school tomorrow. You be good for Mrs. Baxter now, you hear?_ ” Bucky murmured. Natalia nodded, yawning again as she fell asleep. Reyna kissed her forehead. 

“ _I love you,_ ” their little girl murmured before she fell asleep. 

“ _We love you too, sweetheart,_ ” Reyna whispered. Her heart hurt. Everything hurt. Bucky and Reyna got up, walking out of Natalia’s room, Bucky closing the door. 

“Are you heading home anytime soon?” Reyna asked. Bucky looked at her. He shook his head, pulling out his phone. 

“M’Baku. Can you wait a little longer? I gotta talk to Reyna for a second… yeah… yeah okay, thanks.” Bucky hung up. Reyna sighed, pulling out two cups and her water filter, pouring water for the two of them. The two sat at the table, sitting in silence for a couple of seconds. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

  
  
“What was there to tell? You broke up with me, remember?” Reyna bit back. Bucky glared at her. 

“You did,” Reyna clapped back. Bucky’s jaw tightened, but he didn’t deny it.

“I tried calling. Multiple times. You never asked. I got the message. You didn’t want her.” Reyna snarked out. Bucky slammed his cup down quietly. 

“That’s a fucking lie.” He bit out. Reyna raised an eyebrow at him. 

“Really?” Reyna chuckled bitterly. “Alright, go on. Tell me you really wanted Natalia then. Tell me you would’ve been a great father to her back then. Tell me you wouldn’t have made her life miserable.” She spat. Bucky snarled deeply. 

“I would’ve taken care of her. I would’ve taken care of you too.” Bucky hissed. Reyna shook her head. “No. No, you wouldn’t. If you did, you wouldn’t have pushed me away. You would’ve treated her just like an heir. Not a human being. You would’ve hired a fucking nanny. You know I hate nannies.” Reyna pointed out. Bucky gnashed his teeth together. She wasn’t wrong. Reyna hated nannies. She would’ve wanted to raise Natalia by herself, no matter how busy her schedule was. Reyna made a wonderful mother. The past ten years proved that. 

“I know you hate nannies. I know you would’ve worked around a busy ass schedule just to be with our daughter.” Bucky replied. Reyna scowled. 

“She is not _our_ daughter. She’s _my_ daughter. _Mine_.” Reyna growled. Bucky glared at her, a snarl escaping his lips. 

“You’re not her father. You’re just her sperm donor.” Reyna bit out. Bucky was getting angrier by the second. 

“Well, what if I want to be her father now?” Bucky challenged her. Reyna gulped some of her water down angrily. 

“You’re too busy for that,” Reyna replied. “Not on weekends.” Bucky pointed out. 

“You can’t just barge back into our lives, Bucky-” Reyna started to say, but Bucky stood up, towering over her small frame. Then he fell down on his knees. 

“This isn’t me barging back in, doll. I want to be back in your lives, alright? I’ve already missed ten years, please don’t make me miss anymore.” He begged. The anger was gone, replaced with desperation. He wasn’t grabbing at her hands like a beggar man. He looked frantic, almost vulnerable. Raw. Open. Reyna swallowed. 

“You can’t… you can’t just demand it, Buck. You can’t throw around demands…” Reyna whispered, her voice threatening to break. Her eyes were shining with emotion.

“I’m not demanding it, I swear. I wouldn’t lie to you. Just- please,” Bucky begged, his voice becoming hoarse. Reyna’s lithe form was shaking, overcome with emotion. James Buchanan Barnes was a lot of things, but a liar wasn’t one of them. He always told the truth, no matter how brutal it might be. That was why they worked so well together. The two of them never sugar-coated shit around each other during their relationship.

“I know. I know you wouldn’t lie to me. But Bucky, I can’t- I can’t. People will notice. Your reputation will be dragged. I could be called a gold digger. I can’t. I can’t do it. I won’t do it.” Reyna sobbed, shaking her head. Bucky shook his head. “No. No- I don’t care. I don’t fucking care about what people will say, alright? They can say all the shit they want. We know the truth, Rey.” Bucky spoke angrily. 

“It’s not them I’m worried about. It’s Natalia. She’s a child, Bucky. She shouldn’t be dragged in this mess,” Reyna sniffed. Bucky wrapped his arms around her protectively. Reyna didn’t protest, sinking her head into his shoulder. Bucky was able to inhale her body wash, smelling the faint smell of vanilla. Her hair smelled like cinnamon. That hadn’t changed about her. Good. At least that hadn’t vanished from her.

“She’ll be alright. I’ll protect you. I’ll protect both of you, alright? Just… don’t shut me out. Don’t do this. Please let me see her. Let me be the father I should’ve been. I fucked up, I’m sorry doll. I’m so fucking sorry.” Bucky’s voice trembled with emotion. Reyna sniffed, blinking away incoming tears. Bucky wiped them away as she lifted her head up. 

“Sorry isn’t going to cut it, you know,” Reyna replied thickly. “I know,” Bucky whispered. 

“ _I’m sorry_.” Reyna looked at him. 

“ _What for_?” Reyna whispered. Bucky gently cleared the hair away from her face, revealing the dark chocolate irises he loved so much, after all these years. 

“ _For not marrying you when I had the chance_ ,” Bucky replied. Reyna stared at him, watching as he brushed his thumb over her left ring finger. 

“I wasn’t lying to you either when I said I wanted to marry you. Do you remember? Back in high school?” Bucky whispered. 

“No. I remember, James. I remember.” 

**_Sixteen Years Ago_ **

**“I’m gonna marry you.”**

**  
** **  
** **Reyna looked at her boyfriend of eight months. Bucky and Reyna were laying under a tree together for lunch. There were people all around having their own conversations, but the two didn’t care about anybody else but themselves.**

**“We’re just seniors, Bucky,” Reyna responded. Bucky shook his head.**

**“No, I mean after high school. After a couple of years, I’ll marry you.” Bucky said. Reyna stared at him in disbelief.**

**“I’m serious. I’ve loved you since we were kids, doll. That isn’t going to change. I love you. There’s nobody else who I’d rather spend the rest of my life with.” Bucky protested. Reyna laughed softly.**

**“Buck, we’ll be broke.” She teased. Bucky shook his head, smiling.**

**“Doll, we could be broke and married. I don’t care. As long as I got chu, I need nothin’ else. I’d have my world all right here next to me.” Bucky deduced. Reyna’s cheeks had become the color of cherry blossoms. Bucky chuckled. Then Reyna started chuckling. Their chuckling turned into full-on laughter as Bucky kissed her deeply, making her squeal as she felt him roll on top of her. Bucky pulled away from her, a smile on his face. Her heart melted.**

**“You’re a sap, James Buchanan Barnes.”**

**  
** **  
** **“Ah, but I’m** **_your_ ** **sap, Reyna Elizabeth Woods.”**

 **  
** **  
** “I wasn’t lyin’,” Bucky whispered, his voice thick with emotion. 

“I know, James. I know.” Reyna whispered back, holding him tightly. 

“Don’t shut me out. Please don’t shut me out, doll, please…”

  
  


“You son of a bitch!”

  
  
“Wanda. Wanda! Stop!” Wanda Maximoff shrieked and screeched as Vision, her husband, pulled her clawing hands away from the dark-haired male. 

“No, Vision. Let her hit me.” Bucky replied. Wanda snarled. 

“Yes, Vis. Let me hit him. Let me show him how much Rey suffered.” Wanda snarled, her eyes burning with anger. The blonde-haired man still kept a firm hold on his wife’s shoulder. 

“No, Wanda. Calm down, my love.” Vision spoke softly, gently running his fingers through her brown hair. Between the two of them, Vision was the more calm one, compared to his wife. Slowly, Wanda calmed down, but still glared at Bucky. Everyone else didn’t look any better. Tony straight up punched Bucky in the face. Bucky didn’t fight back. His thoughts were too preoccupied with his daughter and Reyna. 

“I’ve been wanting to strike that damn face of yours for ten years, Barnes. How could you fucking do that to her?” Tony demanded. Bucky didn’t answer. Instead, he looked down at the floor, his nose still bleeding. 

“Tones,” Steve spoke softly to his boyfriend. 

“Did you even feel any ounce of fucking regret, Barnes? Did it ever cross your goddamn mind that something was wrong?” Tony shouted. Bucky was slowly beginning to get pissed off. Everyone in the room had already torn him a new one already. He just saved Wanda and Tony for last, simply because he knew they’d be the angriest. Other than Natasha, Wanda and Tony were the other two people Reyna was closest to. Well, them and Sam Wilson.

“Tony,” Steve growled. “That’s enough.” 

“No, Stevie. Let him go on.” Bucky replied. Steve scowled at him. “No, Buck. We’ve already aired it out.” At Steve’s tone, everyone shut up. 

“She asked for you, you know. When she was in labor.” Bucky looked at Rhodey. For a moment, his emotionless face crippled to one of pain. 

**“Bucky!” the twenty-three-year-old woman screamed. Reyna screamed as another contraction hit.**

**“Bucky. Where’s Bucky? I want Bucky!” Reyna screamed. Natalia was proving to be a stubborn child. Reyna had been in labor for seventeen hours. They had barely just gotten her dilated to eight inches, and was encouraging her to push. Reyna screamed and pushed as hard as she could, tears streaming down her face. She was alone. Clint and Natasha had dropped her off at the hospital as soon as her water broke, but were forced to stay outside of the room so the nurses and doctors could help bring out their goddaughter into this world.**

**Reyna pushed one final time as she heard a baby crying. She breathed heavily, her vision slowly coming back into focus.**

**“It’s a healthy baby girl, Ms. Woods,” one of the nurses said with a smile, handing over a pink bundle. Reyna accepted the pink bundle as she looked into Natalia’s eyes, her little baby girl cooing.**

**  
** **  
** **Eventually, they moved her into a new room. Everyone else had come in, and she was surrounded by her friends.**

 **  
** **  
** **“Hey. Meet your niece, Natalia Wanda Woods, everybody.” Reyna spoke. Natasha and Wanda looked at her, tears rolling down their faces. Reyna chuckled weakly. “Well, I gotta name em after the most strongest women in my life, don’t I?” She joked.**

**“** **_We’re honored, starlight_ ** **.” Natasha choked out. Reyna smiled, handing over her little girl to the redheaded woman. Exhaustion took her over immediately. For a moment, she saw a man with dark hair and blue eyes smiling over her.**

**“Bucky…” Reyna whispered softly with a smile, falling asleep. She had been holding onto Steve’s hand. Everyone around the room looked at each other, the room darkening at the mention of the missing man.**

**“Remember what we promised Rey. None of us will tell him if we see him. As far as we’re concerned, Reyna never had Natalia, got it?” Clint spoke roughly. Everyone murmured and nodded in agreement. They looked over at the sleeping woman. A soft gurgle made them look back at the little pink bundle.**

**  
** **  
** **They’d protect their friend and their niece. Whatever it took.**

“She was in labor for hours. She kept sinking in and out of consciousness when she had Lia. She kept asking for you. All the nurses and doctors kept saying she kept screaming for someone named Bucky.” Rhodey spoke. Of everyone in this room other than Vision, Rhodey was the most patient.

“You could’ve called me. Any of you. I would’ve been there.” Bucky spoke quietly. Everyone looked at him. 

“Would you?” Sam Wilson asked softly. The other African-American man had become a close friend in Bucky’s place after Bucky had dumped Sam’s best friend. Needless to say, Sam had been just as pissed as Wanda. 

“You know I would’ve, Sam.” Bucky defended himself. Sam just chuckled sadly. “No. No, you wouldn’t have. Do you know how many days Babygirl cried over your pasty white boy ass?” Sam stood up, walking over to the other man.

  
  
“Every day for two hundred and seventy-five days. Even after she gave birth to Babygirl number two. Do you know how angry we all were when you started going out with those women? Did your five-year relationship mean so fucking little to you that you were able to throw her away just like that?” Sam went on, clearly on a roll. Wanda let him. She knew she was far too emotional and would’ve ended up beating the shit out of Bucky. Sam was much more patient. Usually, Sam Wilson was a chill guy. But after what Bucky did to his Babygirl? It could get him from zero to a hundred real quick. 

“I don’t want to hear your weak ass excuses, Barnes. You can’t just walk back in their lives and demand to be a part of it again. Being a father isn’t just having your goddamn sperm in her and making a baby. Being a father means that you sacrifice your fucking blood, sweat, and tears for her. Being a father means you’re holding your fucking daughter when she has nightmares in order for her to be able to sleep at night. Being a father means you’re there protecting her as much as you can. Reyna shouldn’t have needed to play mommy and daddy just because her baby daddy was a motherfucking dick who left her for money. Naw, you wanna be their lives, Buckaroo? You earn that shit. Say you’re sorry all you want and how much you wanna be in their lives now, but unless you make a fucking effort, you’re _nothing_ but Natalia’s sperm donor.”

  
  


Those conversations haunted him for days. As much as Sam irritated him in the past, the usually laid back man was right in every sense of the word. Bucky watched from his window as the people of New York went about their lives. Today was Friday, which meant Bucky would be able to see Natalia after work. The man was excited. Dot had clearly noticed because she sent Bucky an amused look. 

“You look happy, boss.” Dot remarked. Bucky turned to look at her, a small grin on his face. 

“Natalia asked if we could go to the park. I’m going straight home to change and meet them there at the park. I’ll be able to push my little girl on the swing,” Bucky spoke the last part sadly. Dot sent him a sympathetic look. After Natalia and Reyna had made their appearances in the office a few weeks ago, Bucky had told her everything. From his childhood, how he met Reyna, when he fell in love with her, and how they started dating until he fucked it up. In the end, Bucky had been in tears as Dot consoled him. 

“I’ve always wanted kids, you know Dottie,” Bucky spoke sadly. Dot looked at him. 

“Growing up, my ma was never really there because of work. My pa abandoned her for another woman. I had to help my baby sisters with everything. Making sure they got up in the morning, making sure they got their shit together…” Bucky chuckled bitterly as he dipped into older memories. He remembered learning how to braid so he could braid his younger sister’s hairs so they wouldn’t have to struggle to do it themselves. 

“I always was mad at my pa for leavin’ us, but now look at me. I’m just as fucked up as my old man.” Bucky shook his head.

“Don’t say that, James. You’re not like him.” Dot spoke firmly. Bucky chuckled bitterly, the tears beginning to spring to his eyes. 

“Really, Dottie? Am I really? Because I abandoned my girl when she needed me the most. And then I didn’t even to fucking bother to check up on her for ten fucking years. Hell, you’ve heard me moan her damn name before. I can’t move on, Dot. I can’t. I see her everywhere. I heard her every time I was with those women, Dot. When I lost my arm, she was there for me. She was there and understood me more than nobody else would. Not even Stevie. Just my girl. My doll understood me better than anybody else. And what did I do? I let her go. I let her when she needed me the fucking most! So don’t even try and fucking say I ain’t like him!” Bucky roared. Dot kept a neutral face as Bucky breathed heavily, shaking his head. 

“Sammy’s right. I don’t deserve either of them. I don’t deserve my girls. But I want to. I’m going to try to. I want my girls back. If I have to kneel at Rey’s feet, I’ll fucking do it. She deserves the world. My sun and stars deserves the world _and_ more. I should’ve… I should’ve been there…” Bucky trailed off, beginning to cry again.

  
  
“I love her. I love her so much. It hurts, Dottie. It hurts…” 

  
  


“ _Daddy’s here,_ ” Reyna murmured to Natalia, who squealed. Bucky watched as his little girl ran over to him, jumping into his open arms. 

“ _Daddy’s back,_ ” Natalia murmured into his ear, snuggling into him. Bucky chuckled, his heart hurting. 

“ _Daddy’s back, babygirl,_ ” Bucky replied, spinning her around as she squealed. He put her down as Natalia held onto his hand. 

“Can we go on the swings, daddy? Can you push me?” Natalia asked excitedly, jumping up and down. Bucky chuckled. 

“Course, baby. Let’s go to the swings. You go first, I gotta talk to your mommy for a second, alright?” Bucky asked. Natalia beamed as she sprinted to the swings. Bucky walked over to Reyna, who was looking at Natalia. 

“Heard from a little birdie you met the gang. They chew you out?” Reyna asked, still looking at Natalia. Bucky looked at Natalia, who was smiling and laughing with the other kids. 

  
  


“Yeah. Chewed me out real good. Think I needed that,” Bucky sighed. Reyna finally turned to look at him. Bucky had changed out of his suit when he got home, switching for a regular black shirt with black jeans and a regular pair of sneakers. For a moment, he looked like her Bucky again. Not the CEO Bucky Barnes. Just her Bucky. 

“Sam told you, didn’t he?” Bucky grumbled. Reyna laughed a little. “Yeah, he did.” She replied, smiling at the thought of her best friend. Reyna and Sam had been friends since high school since Sam’s girlfriend at the time did theatre like Reyna. They bonded pretty quickly over Star Wars and Golden Girls. 

“Birdbrain needs to fucking chill,” Bucky grumbled again, making Reyna laugh. He turned to her, a small smile peeking at his lips. It had been a while since he heard her laugh. It was still beautiful, like the rest of her.

“ **Daddy! Come push me!** ” Natalia yelled. Bucky and Reyna shared a look before Bucky walked over to the swings, holding onto his daughter’s shoulders. 

“Ready?” Bucky asked. Natalia giggled.

  
  
“Ready to comply!” Natalia cheered. Bucky chuckled and kissed the top of her head. 

“Alright, one, two-” Bucky pulled her backwards and pushed her forward, watching as his little girl held onto the metal chains, laughter spilling from her lips as she swung forward. Reyna watched the two of them, almost like a weight was lifted off of her chest. For a moment, she let herself sink into a dream. That what had happened ten years ago was just a bad dream. That this Bucky that had been so cold, so egotistical, that it was just a bad fever dream. That this Bucky wasn’t the Bucky she had known. The Bucky that she had known was kind, considerate. Loving. He had loved her once. For a moment, she allowed herself to believe. She looked down at her left hand, imagining a ring there. Reyna looked back up at Bucky, who was looking at her with something in his eyes. She didn’t know what it was. But then, his eyes softened. 

It was like the old Bucky never left. Maybe he didn’t. Maybe the old Bucky was still in there somewhere. 

  
  


“Hey, I gotta go back to work. Can you watch over Natalia for me?” Reyna asked as soon as they went inside the apartment. Natalia had fallen asleep on their walk home, and Bucky had offered to carry her. Reyna didn’t object. 

“You need me to walk you there? I can walk you there.” Bucky replied. Reyna shook her head. 

“No, Bucky. I already got an Uber. I’ll be fine. I’ll get an Uber back.” Reyna replied. Bucky nodded, although reluctantly. Reyna smiled a little at him as the two walked inside Natalia’s room, tucking her in. 

“ _Mommy? Daddy?_ ” Natalia slurred. 

“ _Mommy’s gotta go back to work, baby. Daddy will stay with you, alright? Just until mommy gets back._ ” Reyna spoke softly. Natalia nodded sleepily. 

_“Daddy staying?_ ” Natalia asked sleepily. 

“ _Daddy’s staying, sweetheart. I’ll be here if you need me._ ” Bucky replied softly. 

“ _Mmm… don’t leave, daddy… don’t leave me again…_ ” Natalia mumbled as she fell asleep. Bucky’s grip on her hand tightened just a little bit. 

“She used to dream about you. She asked a bunch of questions when she started growing up. There was little I could tell her. I’d sleep with her to calm the nightmares, but there was such little I could’ve done at the time…” Reyna trailed off. Bucky stood up, hugging her tightly. 

“No. You did enough, doll. You did enough. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for the two of you.” Bucky replied quietly. Reyna hugged him back. 

“Go to the theatre. Break a leg, Rey.”  
  
  
Bucky stayed with Natalia even after Reyna left. He watched over Natalia like a hawk, only responding to business emails through text messages because he didn’t dare wake her up. Eventually, he made his way out of her room, beginning to explore the apartment, but left Reyna’s room untouched. As he walked down the hall, he saw pictures. Pictures of Reyna, and pictures of Natalia. Even some of the pictures with the gang were sprinkled in. But none of him. It would’ve made Natalia begin to ask questions, and Reyna wasn’t quite ready to break the news to her. 

Pictures of Natalia as a baby, pictures of her taking her first steps… Bucky felt the tears coming again. He should’ve been there. He should’ve been there to see Natalia take her first steps, hear her first words. See her off to kindergarten for the first time. He missed out on so much.

  
  
Suddenly, he heard screaming come from Natalia’s room. He broke out into a sprint, opening her door as Natalia withered and grasped at the sheets. 

“ _Mommy!_ ” Natalia screamed. Bucky knelt down, gently holding her, beginning to rock her in place.

“ _Mommy’s at work, baby. Don’t worry, daddy’s here._ ” He soothed her softly. Natalia stopped thrashing, her body relaxing at the realization her daddy was here. 

“ _Daddy?_ ” Natalia asked quietly, her voice small.

  
  
“ _Yeah, babygirl. Daddy’s here. Don’t worry, nothing’s gonna hurt you doll._ ” Bucky soothed her. Natalia started crying into his shoulder. 

“ _Daddy. Daddy stay?_ ” Natalia sniffed. Bucky gently placed her back in bed, crawling inside as he held his daughter protectively. 

“Daddy’s staying, sweetheart. I’m not going anymore. You’re safe with me, sweet thing.”

  
  
Reyna came home after the last show. She thanked the Uber and made her way into the apartment complex, going up the elevator to get into her apartment she shared with Natalia. Worry bit at her. Were Natalia and Bucky okay? Did he leave her? No, Bucky wouldn’t have left her, would he? Reyna sprinted to her apartment door, opening the door quicker than she ever had in her life, slamming the door shut as she made her way to Natalia’s room, seeing the door open. 

What she saw made her pause. Bucky and Natalia were both snuggled together on her bed, Bucky holding his daughter protectively as they slept. The sight made her almost fall to her knees. He hadn’t left after all. He was still here. Reyna turned, making her way to the bathroom.

“ _Doll, is that you?_ ” She stopped in her tracks, turning around. Bucky had woken up a little, seeing her standing at Natalia’s door. 

“ _Yeah, it’s me. I gotta get ready for bed. I’ll be back._ ” She heard Bucky make a noise as she walked to the bathroom, getting ready for bed, changing into Bucky’s burgundy long sleeve shirt and a pair of black yoga pants, making her way back to Natalia’s room. 

“ _C’m here, doll,_ ” Bucky spoke sleepily. Reyna paused for a second, before walking over and climbing into the other side of the bed. Bucky slipped an arm over the two of them as Reyna snuggled into Natalia, holding her close. 

“ _Mommy?_ ” Natalia slurred.

  
“ _Yeah. It’s me, baby._ ” Reyna whispered in her ear. Natalia smiled, falling back asleep. She felt a hand slipping into hers. She gazed across the bed, seeing Bucky’s sleepy smile. She slipped her hand into his, falling asleep.


End file.
